Feeling good today
I am feeling good today. It is not as hot anymore and I got a good night’s sleep and I am in a happy mood. It is a long 4-day weekend, so I am just going to enjoy it.
I talked with my mentor and she was thrilled, and said not to worry about my promotion being affected by my maternity leave, she said as long as I was qualified I would still get it. It is weird since she influences promotions and she is my mentor, so she is in a bit of a conflict of interest situation. So I didn’t tell her that I may look for a job in another department or company when I get back, especially since I am sure my priorities will change and who knows what I will want after Mat leave.
Doctor’s appointment today
So I called my family doctor yesterday to book an appointment. They were full, but since I told the receptionist what it was about, she squeezed me in. Especially since my doctor will probably first send me for a blood test which should not take too long
How, am I feeling? Well actually that is rather involved. You see yesterday at a work social event they announced promotions and even though I was on the short list, I wasn't on the list. I asked my manager if there would be any more promotions for the year and he said that he would discuss it at my salary raise meeting next Tuesday. Which probably means they will give me a good raise to compensate for not getting promoted. But I still feel very un-recognized and under-appreciated. I have been under my proper promotion level for at least a couple years now and am getting really frustrated. So I would quit right now except, well, I am expecting and I really don't want to start at a new company and go on Mat leave right away. So instead I am going to hang out with this company for a year and start looking for work when I am on Mat leave (see how I don't mention the company name – don't want to get sued or lose my anonymity).
I am lucky, in Canada we get a year Mat leave (which is really unemployment insurance), however I don't know if I can afford to take a full year. It is equivalent of $400 CDN a week (depends on your salary, but it maxes out at 400).
But I am probably jumping ahead of myself since I haven't even had a doctor confirm the pregnancy, and I am still concerned that it might be another eptopic.
Anyway, back to "how am I feeling". I should be estatic right? I have always wanted to have children and we have been trying for just over a year now. But instead, I find myself thinking about injustices at work. Is it because the "baby" idea just does not seem real yet? It is because I don't want to let myself get too excited, just in case? Maybe it will feel more real when I see the doctor and I get the results of the blood test.
My husband started taking photos of me yesterday so that we can have a "photo a day" for the kid starting from day 1. We setup the camera on a tripod and marked the corners so we should be able to reproduce the setup so the photos all are aligned and we can create a simple animation.
